CHAPTER ELEVEN
The whole ride up she picked at the gauze, another stupid mistake. She still feels a little faint
from the lost blood, and stumbles to the cafe car to buy 5 candy bars and a soda. They're
gone in 10 minutes, and she forces herself to not feel bad about the calories. The scenery on
the way up is gorgeous.
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She let Tracy know she was coming, right after she booked the tickets. That much was a
given. She met her at the train station and they shared a hug. Poppy immediately noticed the
deers antlers were far longer than when they were roommates freshman year, they look
healthy. Hers were shaved to stubs still, it was some of the only self care she did. It was
really more brand care, people wouldn't like her with antlers. Neither of them said a word
while they drove to Tracys pad, a tiny house built in the 50s, probably from a kit. Theres no
way Tracy didn't notice the bandage, but she never brought it up. Such things weren't
uncommon, unfortunately. Poppy did find a fresh roll of gauze on the bathroom counter
one day, though, a kind gesture.
--- --- ---
Tracy's changed a lot since freshman year of college. As roommates they couldn't stand
living together, but as friends they remained close. Still, Poppy hadn't seen her in person
until now, and she's surprised by the shift. Gone is the annoying nasally self-doubting pest
to a respectable member of society. She works at a record shop, she lets her antlers grow
long, she wears sweaters every day from September to April. She's, generally, a cool person.
Coincidentally she's also the person she always talked about wanting to date in college, go
figure.
"So stubs, what brings you to the beautiful north?"
"What doesn't? I've got family friends up here I wanted to see, plus you of course. And I
missed Kaye's greatly." Kaye's, a chain of convenience stores / gas stations that had
phenomenal food and were famous for their ice cream in a box. Actually... "Where's the
nearest Kayes to here? Can we go? I need copious amounts of ice cream."
"Uh, sure, it's just around the corner, we can walk there. You brought a coat, right?"
"Of course I did, there's no way I could forget the winters up here."
The two of them left Tracys apartment and walked to the store. It was starting to rain
outside, and the rain was just about freezing. It's forecasted to warm up in the next few days,
but the Big Grey was already settled over the state, unshakeable until April at best. "You're
keeping your antlers shorter than before, why is that?"
Poppy felt her stubs of antlers, one of them cracked when she fell off her bike. That'll take
ages to heal up enough for her to trim it, beautiful. "Oh you know, I have to keep up some
appearances. Doing this radio show means lots of interviews and appearances, and I don't
think people would like a girl with big antlers."
"None of that sounded like you enjoy having them this short."
"I mean! Even before I had them a little long, just because it was.. nice? I don't get the same
kind of dysphoria over it anymore, at some point I'd like to grow them long again. You
didn't mention anything about the radio show?"
"Cheesy told me about it, I listened to a few episodes and it's pretty alright. I miss the music
segments though."
"Cheesy? Oh, Kelpy!! Gods, it's probably having a panic attack about this whole thing now.
My just.. leaving." So many people were relying on the show, on her. She had just left
without saying goodbye. The thought of all those people, people with faces and names she
abandoned...
Something hard started to form in Poppy's throat, and it threatened to suffocate her.
Suddenly she saw herself running through the cathedral again, blood flowing from her
gash. Was she running away or towards something? The hall seemed to go on forever. Not
paying attention to the sidewalk, she slips on black ice and Tracy barely manages to catch
her.
"You ok hun?"
Poppy couldn't respond, the world was closing in around her. Why can't she be honest with
Tracy about this? Why can't she talk at all? Her job is to talk, and now she can't get a word
out?
"We don't have to talk anymore, ok? Come on, lets go get that ice cream"
When they got back to Tracys apartment they split the box of mint chocolate chip, it was as
delicious as she remembered.
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